Kramer vs. Kramer: A Trial of Love
- donna31489
- Feb 18, 2015
- 3 min read
When most people hear a reference to the film Kramer vs. Kramer they think divorce. I don’t. Divorce is just the backdrop to this poignant love story of father and son that is anchored around a custody battle.
Winner of 5 Academy Awards in 1980, including Best Picture, Best Actor and Best Supporting Actress, this film strikes an emotional chord, flawlessly illustrating a man’s journey of self-actualization through his relationship with his son.
In the film, Dustin Hoffman plays Ted Kramer. Ted is an absent father and insensitive ad man whose career consumes him, leaving little time for his young son Billy and attention-hungry wife, Joanna. Only in about a quarter of the film, Streep gives a polarizing and powerful performance as Joanna that will make you strongly dislike her at moments and sympathize with her at others.
One of the reasons this film works so well is due to the impeccable characterization of Ted and Joanna. If these two characters were created in a manner that you sided with one or the other, the film wouldn’t work. There would be no internal emotional struggle later during the court scenes.
When Joanna does one of the most unthinkable things a mother can do—leaves her own child—you can’t hate her. Streep brings sensitivity to Joanna that makes her likeable. Many look at her character as cold and selfish, but in reality she loved her son so much, she wanted to better herself for him. She was in search of self-fulfillment, which Ted finds through his son.
After Joanna leaves, Ted is left to pick up the pieces of a life that he is very far removed from. The rocky start of Ted’s relationship with Billy as a single parent seamlessly illustrates a value I firmly believe in. You can’t give someone else the love they need, if you don’t love yourself. Your relationship with yourself carries into your relationship with others. Family. Friends. Children. Anyone.
You realize early on that Ted needs to learn a little about himself in order to become the parent Billy needs. And he needs to do it while juggling the pressure of professional and domestic responsibilities.
The first morning Ted has to make breakfast for Billy sets up the dynamic between father and son. They resent each other. They don’t know each other. They don’t want to get to know each other. As a result, Ted’s anger towards Joanna bursts out as fast and sporadic as the ingredients he’s spilling in a chaotic rush to prepare French toast. You realize he is emotionally disconnected from himself AND his son.
As you see the bond between Ted and Billy blossom—shedding resentment and learning to love,—you notice the attention to detail put into the direction by Robert Benton. There is not a shot, scene or word wasted.
One scene in particular does this remarkably well. And it is silent. A powerful tactic Benton employs several times in the film, most notably towards the end, which I will get to eventually.
There is a short scene mid-film of Ted and Billy in their morning breakfast routine. You hear the sound of plates moving across the table and pages of their morning papers turning. The authenticity permeates the scene and tells you so much about how far their relationship has come in such a short time without one word. They are content with each other.
When Joanna decides to return over a year later and wants custody of Billy, Ted fights tooth and nail, both in and out of the courtroom, to keep his son.
The court scenes are filled with a subdued sensitivity and honesty that will touch anyone, even if you’re not a child of divorced or separated parents. This is due in great part to Benton’s attention to detail in the dialogue. Thought provoking and heart-wrenchingly human, these scenes leave you thinking less about who will win the case and more about love. The love that creates the unbreakable bond between a parent and child.
Ultimately, Joanna wins the case and is awarded full custody of Billy.
The morning Joanna is to come pick up Billy to go to his new home, Benton recreates the hectic breakfast scene from the beginning of the film. But this time, it is a drastic contrast down to the little details of just how they are dressed. Everything is put together with the sound of silence enhancing the high running emotions between father and son. It showcases how Ted’s relationship with Billy, and with himself, has come full circle since their first scene together.
Profoundly powerful, this film is less about divorce and more about humanity and how you learn the most from the people around you. Some of the most beautiful love stories come from the people you least expect and act as a life a lesson you can carry with you through all ages.
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